Movies and Quotes (Our 3 Favorite Things)

We here at TUQS love movies almost as much as we love quotes, and don't even get us started on movie-quotes! As movie lovers (Meaning we have literally made love to a VCR... or two) we'd like to extend our potent quotables to our favorite movies. This blog will all be one sentence plot summaries of famous movies, as you might see on a basic cable description, or tatooed on your uncle's lower back. We'd like to say we came up with this... so we will. Doug Benson's new show had nothing to do with this, now stop asking before I sweep kick your legs! That was a movie reference, but it's ok if you didn't get it, not all of you are as big of fans of Titanic as we are.

"Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones fight illegal immigrants!"
--Men in Black

"Johnny Depp on way too many drugs!"
--Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

"Johnny Depp on way too many boats!"
--Pirates of the Carribean

"Johnny Depp killing way too many women!"
--Secret Window

"Johnny Depp eats way too much Chocolate!"
--Charlie and the Chocolate Factory/possibly Chocolat

"Struggle of Natives against militant invasion!"
--Pochahontas

See Above in Blue
--Avatar

"Escapades of a semi-retarded ping pong master."
--Forrest Gump

"Irish Badasses kill people!"
--Boondock Saints, The Departed, Leap Year, P.S. I Love You

"A young man travels back in time and almost becomes his own father!"
--Back to the Future

"A young man must learn to use his other hand."
--Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back (Thank you Doug)

"A computer program plays with its balls"
--Tron: Legacy

"Illegal Alien is smuggled out of the country!"
--ET

"A man opens a box and gets more than he asked for!"
--Raiders of the Lost Ark

"A black man beats up an italian guy!"
--Rocky

"A man opens a box and gets more than he asked for"
--Se7en

"A story of triumph in the face of racial prejudice."
--American History X

"Two dogs and a kitten looking to get home."
--O Brother Where Art thou?

"Everybody dies."
--No Country for Old Men

"A satirical look at the History of the world."
--The Passion of the Christ

"The story of Michael Vick."
--Old Yeller

"Threesome? Yes please."
--Wild Things

"Tom Hanks spends years on his own and grows a beard."
--Castaway

"Tom Hanks spends years on his own and grows a beard."
--Forrest Gump

"Tom Hanks spends years on his own and grows a beard."
--The DaVinci Code

"Documentary about voice changing software."
--The Dark Knight

"A pre-cancer Patrick Swayze and a pre-cancer-of-the-career Wesley Snipes in a manly action movie."
--To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything! Julie Newmar

"The story of a man in his underwear tracking down gang crime."
--Superman

"The story of a man in his underwear tracking down gang crime."
--Batman

"The story of a man in his underwear tracking down gang crime."
--The Big Lebowski

"How to tell if you're gay."
--Dear John

The Quotish are coming!

We know what you're thinking, yes, the title of this post is a double meaning (If you don't get it, try to spell coming phonetically). As far as taking half a month off we'd like to quote our respective assorted uncle's and other family members: "STOP CRYING AND SUCK IT UP!" (also something Crocker says all the time) Good, now that we have that out of the way we'd also like to put this forth, we're sorry for the break, everybody needs a vacation, even drug dealers. We understand you can't go long without us, also like drug dealers, and for depriving you of your "crack" we are sorry. So lets get this show on the road... Homo. (Had to put it in there somewhere)

"Such a beautiful day, not a cloud in the sky..."
--Pilot stationed at Pearl Harbor, December 7, 1941

"You'd be amazed! Bleach can clean just about anything..."
--Ted Bundy

"I thought about being veterinarian when I was a kid, I just love dogs!"
--David Berkowitz

"Who said clowns were scary!?"
--John Wayne Gacy Jr.

"Last guy I told to knock on wood punched me in the face!"
--George Washington

"You didn't know I was an artist? I have one of my paintings right above my oven"
--Adolf Hitler

"Define 'statutory'"
--John Mayer

"Hey man, do I have something on my face?"
--Charles Manson

"Magic Johnson ain't got nothing ON ME!!!"
--Freddie Mercury

"True knowledge only exists in knowing that Aristotle's mom wants to Σ my Δ"
--Socrates

"Speak softly and carry a big stick"
--Ron Jeremy

"This water tastes sooooo good!"
--Michael Phelps